Complaining Reveals Entitlement Mentality
Last week I wrote about how to “un-teach”
entitlement to our children. Is it possible that adults don’t
lead rightly by example? If you want to know, look at your most
frequent complaints.
No one likes a complainer. I don’t. You
don’t. And yet we slide down that slippery slope even during the
best of times. Our complaints reveal our hearts. Could they be
directly related to the erroneous belief that we are entitled?
Listening to the radio this week an announcer
said, “And when we come back, we will deal with the subject of
people who irritate us.” The cynical side of me immediately
thought, “There isn’t enough time to cover this topic. There are
days when I even irritate myself.”
After the commercial break his lead-in
statement was, “If people irritate you the problem isn’t people;
it’s your pride.”
When we believe we shouldn’t be treated a
certain way, or inconvenienced in any way, we have taken the
position that we are extremely important. Entitlement is a
dressed-up version of pride.
Do you ever complain out of impatience? I
pray and pray for something and don’t hear any response from
God. Too often my patient peacefulness erodes with each passing
day. I’d rather sit in the operating room than the waiting room.
“Cut me open if You must, Lord. Just don’t leave me in
suspense.”
Joyce Meyer used to talk about “waiting
well.” Lately I’ve been asking myself if I am waiting well, or
arrogantly wondering what is taking Him so long. I am not
entitled to God’s answer on my schedule. The better I know God,
the more aware I am that His timing is more perfect for my need
than mine is.
Then when I do receive that long-awaited
answer, I have been known to complain. Usually this is because
somewhere I have closeted resentment about a different issue.
Resentment is like air in the fuel line. Eventually it will stop
us from moving forward.
Thankfulness and grumbling cannot coexist.
When I am truly thankful, there is no room in my heart for
complaint. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 reminds us that “…in all things
give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
Another situation when we are prone to
complain out of entitlement is useless comparison. Money.
Beauty. Wardrobe. House. Job. Car. Comparisons drag us away from
our blessings. Either we will feel “better than…” or “less
than…” Pride or envy.
Paul wrote to the Philippians, “Not that I am
speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever
situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and
I know how to abound.” (Phil 4:11)
God tells us to be content with what we have.
If we were truly entitled to more, He would supply it.
And finally, we don’t think life is fair. We
deserve better and complain bitterly about it.
When I think about an unfair life, I remember
the Africans who were kidnapped from their homes and brought
here to work as slaves in the 16th -19th
centuries. The Jews in Europe during World War II. The 2400
children I watched die in East Africa in 1980.
How dare I complain because another driver
cut me off in traffic? Or because God didn’t answer my prayer
quickly enough. Or because someone else is richer, thinner, or
has more talent than me.
The world tells us that we are entitled to
more than we have because we are worth it. God tells us to be
thankful in all things and appreciate His blessings.